You wouldn't think that those would be the words to describe my life right now, but they OH SO very much are. I like to think that my life is very controlled and it is. I've taken hold of some situations and I'm working on my self improvement as I have posted about previously. HOWEVER no matter how much control I take of my life and no matter how much try to declutter, I can't control other peoples lives. There are a few people in my life right now that I feel that if they would just LISTEN to me, Take my ADVICE, and do what I say it would make thier lives SO MUCH EASIER, not just Easier, BETTER. But naturally I guess life doesn't work that way. And I sit here and I get angry and upset and then fume over it. BUT then I need to realize that it's so much easier to tell OTHER people what to do in thier life than it is to take advice from people. Like me. I'm not happy in my job. Sure its a great steady income and being 23 and having that in this economy I am very lucky. But so I've been super wishy washy about getting another job, or going back to school, or getting a different kind of job. I feel as though my days are on repeat. I do the EXACT same thing EVERYDAY. and that would be awesome if I enjoyed it. but I don't.
I wake up at 6:30, get dressed for work. leave by 7, get to work by 8, sit there ALL day by myself, pinterest, blog, read, add in a bit of answering phones, listen to the Same clients tell the SAME jokes, (inster courtesy laugh) go to lunch around 1:15.. either sleep in car, eat JimmyJohns, or read. come back to work. Sort mail. deliver mail, pinterest, blog, close everything up. clock out leave at 5:00 get home at 6:00, either Rachel made food or I go out to get something. watch TV. REPEAT.
HOW FREAKIN BORING AM I?! I mean really?! So when people as me how I am... I say.. oh good, the same, I work, yup still in AZ.... blah blah blah... I need to spice up my freakin life!!! and yet... I really have no clue how to do that....SIGH. I mean... I've thought about going back to school but sheesh.. I hate student loans...... like REALLY hate them.... my mom has suggested just taking one or two classes a semester but even then they would have to be online and those are still mucho mucho amounts of money's..... Oh my life.. REPEAT. I'm trying to pray about how to give me some drive.... I'm really losing my umph. I suppose i'll find it soon. So any suggestions would be helpful.. I mean .. I guess I have my whole life to pay off student loans...... So here is where I am asking someone else to tell me what to do with my life?! FIX ME! I'm BROKEN! : P